Guide To Sex Dating Sites

CFNM - or Clothed Female, Nude Male encounters can be a fun way to play and it comes with the added bonus of being about as safe as sex can get these days.  There are various ways to find such encounters.  Adult dating sites will give you the opportunity to meet sexually adventurous women who enjoy the power of  CFNM, so if it’s something you’re interested in, don’t hesitate to mention it in your profile. 

 A CFNM encounter can take several forms.  It can be a one on one thing, or it could be a group activity (which can be a real rush).  Sometimes it is strictly a look but don’t touch situation, while other times your partners may touch you or themselves, tease you visually and physically, or there may be discipline and/or humiliation games involved.  Because everyone has their fantasies and preconceived ideas regarding what CFNM is all about, I recommend you set the ground rules right from the start, so everyone involved knows what to expect.  It’s also a good idea only to play these games with people you have at least some trust in, because you will be in a vulnerable state, so someone with the wrong intentions can turn a really good experience into a really bad one pretty quickly. 

If you’re new to CFNM, I suggest you start with a one on one situation in a private setting.  Basically, you get naked, while your partner stays fully dressed, even if fully dressed means something sexy.  Then, she gets to call the shots.  She might have you masturbate in front of her, she might have you bend over and then spank you, she might take pictures of you, or she might have you rub her feet or clean her windows.  The not knowing what she’ll have you doing is a big part of the thrill. 

If you’re really daring, you can give her the option of telling you where and when to get naked.  Be careful though - although female public nudity is usually tolerated, male public nudity may not be.  You don’t want to wind up getting arrested and convicted as a sex offender.

 If you enjoy CFNM or are really uninhibited, a group encounter can be a lot of fun - especially if you’re the only man in the group!  Being stark naked in front of a group of appreciative women can be an enormous turn-on.  You could offer to do a naked waiter routine for your sex buddy and her friends - even if you work for free, the “tips” will make it all worthwhile. 

Ultimately, the CFNM situation usually develops into the NFNM situation because all involved wind up getting too turned on to keep things under control.  It’s all good though!

When you first start looking at online dating sites, particularly adult/sex dating sites, you’ll find that almost all of them offer some type of free membership option. This may seem like a good thing, but you have to consider what your goals are in taking the time to sign up on a dating site in the first place.

Is your goal to A) Meet women and get laid, or B) Not spend any money. If you said “both”, I’m afraid that those two goals are not very compatible. Now, you can definitely meet women and get laid without spending a LOT of money, but there’s a few areas where investing a few bucks will dramatically enhance your online dating success.

The first place you DON’T want to “go cheap” is on your adult/sex dating site membership. Yes, the free option is there, but in this case, free is going to cost you in other ways. Those sites that are totally free (there is no paid membership option) are pretty much a waste of time in my experience. Mostly what you’ll get from these sites is a TON of spam - both to your message box on the site and to your registered email address - promoting porn sites and “male enhancement” products. The other thing you’ll get is messages from women who are supposedly wanting to hook-up, but when you look at these profiles, you find out that this woman who wants to get together right away is listed as living hundreds or even thousands of miles away! Hmmm. Do you think maybe those messages are really just being sent by the webmaster to keep you going to the site, keeping the traffic count up to allow for better banner ad sales? No! Surely that message from that hotty who lives on the other side of the country is for real - after all, a stud like you is worth travelling for!

Everything just said about the totally free sites will also hold true for most of the sites with a paid membership option if you only have a free membership. Some of the ones that have the paid membership option will take things a step farther. If you only sign up for a free membership, within a day or two, you’ll start getting messages from women - but the catch is you can’t contact them or even view their profile without paying for a membership. Hmmm. Could those messages you’re getting be a trick to get you to buy a paid membership? Surely not! But once you do buy a membership, suddenly those women who were so hot for you just drop off the face of the earth. Strange how that works! I tried several adult dating sites with free memberships, and of the ones I signed up with, there were only three where I didn’t run into this trick which is why I recommend those sites on my main website. I won’t mention them by name here, but if you want to know which adult dating sites seem to be legit - just check out the recommended sites on my blogroll.

Now, you can hope for the best, and every once in a while you might actually meet a woman to hookup with with a free membership, but if you want to get laid, you really need to pony up the bucks to get the paid membership. With a paid membership on a decent dating site, you’ll usually get some perks - higher placement in searches, ability to view full profiles, pictures, etc.. Some sites also offer additional perks for “deluxe” memberships, such as a limited time exclusive on contacting new female members (this can be a HUGE advantage, given the large amount of competition you’ll face when contacting women).

So, if you’re looking for hookups through adult dating websites, do yourself a favor and pay for a membership - and if money is not a problem, pay for the most deluxe membership they have.

Some women like to see how much they can get away with and how much you’re willing to put up with in order to have sex with them.  Many guys assume if they give in to what the women they date want (or at least seem to want) it will improve their chances of getting laid.   This is usually NOT the case!  In fact, the more you stay cool and play hard to get, the more likely it is that she won’t play hard to get.

Women will test you.  Most women are most attracted to strong, confident men and they’re going to test you to see if your a “real man” or a weak kiss-ass.  You could simply refuse to play the game - and that will get you laid a lot more often than giving in and sucking up to her, but a far more effective approach is to use humor to deal with the tests.

The first test you’ll often come up against is the plan for the date.  Most women want you to have a plan for the date.  They won’t necessarily LIKE your plan, but they want you to at least HAVE a plan.  So if she asks you “What do you want to do?”, you need to have something better ready for an answer than “I don’t know, what do you want to do?” 

So, let’s say you’re prepared with a plan and she shoots it down.  If she doesn’t come up with an alternate plan right away, you need to suggest another plan (always have at least two in mind).  If she shoots that plan down too, but still doesn’t have a suggestion of her own, she may simply be testing you and is intentionally being difficult.  If you suspect this to be the case, start teasing her about it.  You could say something like “You know, if I wanted a date that was this much of a pain in the ass, I’d find a chick with a strap-on!” (this can be said dead-serious or with a little smirk or a wink). Most women at this point will start defending themselves.  Your date may pretend to be upset with you (or may even really be upset with you - it doesn’t really matter!) for saying that she’s a pain in the ass and demand an apology.  To which you can say something like, “I’m really sorry…that you’re such a pain in the ass!”  Don’t give in and get all apologetic.  Stand your ground and if she continues to shoot down any plans you come up with, you can take the game to its conclusion by finally stating something like “I’ll tell you what, I’m going to [insert your preferred plan here], if you want to join me, I know you’ll have a great time - well, obviously because you’ll be with me (said in a half-serious tone so as not to come across as too arrogant).  If you don’t want to join me, that’s cool, just give me a call sometime when you’re not being a pain in the ass - if there is such a time - and maybe we can try to hookup again.”  If she ws just testing you, most likely she’s going to go along with your plan at this point.  If she really is simply a pain in the ass, good riddance - go find someone easier to get along with. 

When you’re meeting women on adult dating sites, you will typically have a lot fewer tests than you get from women in more conventional dating situations.  The main tests deal with planning of dates and then occasionally you’ll run across the women who want to play hot and cold to tease you and see how you’ll react.  Again, you need to be in control of yourself and not play her game.  For example, let’s say she’s all over you one minute, but the moment you try to move things along, she goes cold and backs off.  The first time she does this, it’s time for you to play it really cool.  When she goes hot again and tries to get you heated up, it’s your turn to give her the cold shoulder - hold her back and say something like “Slow down, baby, I’m not just some piece of meat!”  (said in an exaggerated tone of voice to hint that you’re playing).  Most of the time, women who play the hot/cold game will try even harder at this point to get you turned on.  Continue to play it cool - make her do the work.  The more you hold back, the less she will.  Eventually, she’ll get so turned on that she’ll forget the game and you’ll wind up naked and protesting to her that you really shouldn’t fuck her and reward her lack of respect for you as a human being, but what the hell!

Dating should be fun, not a power struggle.  If your date is trying to make things a power struggle, have some fun with it.  If things aren’t working between you and your prospective date, move on to someone more fun.  It doesn’t matter how hot she may look and how much you want to bang her - there are always plenty of other hot women you’ll want to hookup with who will be a lot more fun.  NEXT!

For more about how to deal with women in dating situations, check out the “Success With Women” page of my website.

When using online adult dating sites, you have to remember that you are playing a numbers game. With the “official” ratio of men looking for women versus women looking for men being about 10 to 1, and the real ratio (once you factor in the high number of fake female profiles being used to sell porn site memberships) being more like 50 to 1, you have a lot of competition to deal with.

The tips and methods I give you in my E-Book “Secrets To Getting Laid Through Adult Dating Sites” (for info, go to www.guidetosexdatingsites.com/ebooks.html) will help you greatly improve your odds of meeting women on adult dating sites, but you will still need to be persistent.

You need to realize that the real women on these sites can get literally hundreds of messages per week. Even with the best techniques for getting your messages noticed and read, and even with really good techniques for having your messages attract interest, you will still be competing against a lot of other guys. So, if you don’t get a response to your message to a particular prospect right away, hit her up again in a few weeks. Notice I said a few WEEKS. Some guys make the mistake of sending a prospect a message every day or every few days in the hopes of getting a response. But that approach just screams “STALKER!” which is usually only going to wind up getting you blocked from sending her any more messages.

By being persistent (but not too persistent), you increase your chances of getting noticed in a good way, and this increases your chances of getting laid.

Good luck!