Guide To Sex Dating Sites

Besides the usual scams I discuss in my Guide To Sex Dating Sites, there are a couple of other scams that are floating around that you should be aware of.

The first dating site scam to watch out for is the one where either a woman contacts you from your profile or you contact her and she starts to tell you a sob story about how she lost her job, or her husband left her with bills to pay, or some other story about how she’s desperate for money.  She asks you to send money to her PayPal account or similar system in return for some naked pictures, or she may even hint that she might have sex with you.  If she’s promising naked pics, chances are you’ll at least get the pics, but with all the free naked pictures on the internet, is that really a great deal?  Sure you may feel like a slightly dirty knight in shining armor, but if she were really hurting for cash and she’s willing to show off her body, she could set up a porn site or start stripping.  In fact, in such cases, chances are you basically bought a porn membership, but you can tell yourself that you’re helping her out if it makes you feel better. 

Now, if she’s promising sexual favors for the money, chances are you’re not going to see any “return on invsetment”.  Even if the offer is legit, that’s called soliciting prostitution and if you get caught, you go to jail - not a great deal.  You’re far better off learning how to have success with women so that you don’t need to buy sex. 

Scam number two is a much more complex one.  In this scam, you meet a woman who lives out of town or otherwise doesn’t live close enough to meet in person, but she sends some sexy pics, you chat, and she continues an online relationship with you for weeks, or even months.  She then tells you that she really wants to meet you and she’s got some vacation time coming, but she is a little short on the money for a plane ticket.  She asks if you’ll send her the money, or even part of the money for the ticket.  You do and… well, there is no and, because that’s the last you hear from her.  The people running these scams (some of them are men who are just using pictures of sexy women) are very patient and run a nice little business from this system. 

The bottom line here is there really is no need to send anyone money on these deals.  You don’t need to send money for naked pics - there are plenty of free ones on the internet.  Sob story or not, a hot woman who is willing to show her body will never starve to death!  And if you develop an online love affair and she wants to meet, you offer to come to her - don’t send her money to come to you.  If she (or he) is running a scam, chances are your offer to travel to her won’t be met with much enthusiasm.  As another option if you simply MUST try to hookup with a long-distance lover, have her buy the ticket on her credit card and you’ll reimburse her when she comes for the visit.  Again, the scammers won’t be too keen on this idea. 

Be smart and keep both hands on your wallet!

CFNM - or Clothed Female, Nude Male encounters can be a fun way to play and it comes with the added bonus of being about as safe as sex can get these days.  There are various ways to find such encounters.  Adult dating sites will give you the opportunity to meet sexually adventurous women who enjoy the power of  CFNM, so if it’s something you’re interested in, don’t hesitate to mention it in your profile. 

 A CFNM encounter can take several forms.  It can be a one on one thing, or it could be a group activity (which can be a real rush).  Sometimes it is strictly a look but don’t touch situation, while other times your partners may touch you or themselves, tease you visually and physically, or there may be discipline and/or humiliation games involved.  Because everyone has their fantasies and preconceived ideas regarding what CFNM is all about, I recommend you set the ground rules right from the start, so everyone involved knows what to expect.  It’s also a good idea only to play these games with people you have at least some trust in, because you will be in a vulnerable state, so someone with the wrong intentions can turn a really good experience into a really bad one pretty quickly. 

If you’re new to CFNM, I suggest you start with a one on one situation in a private setting.  Basically, you get naked, while your partner stays fully dressed, even if fully dressed means something sexy.  Then, she gets to call the shots.  She might have you masturbate in front of her, she might have you bend over and then spank you, she might take pictures of you, or she might have you rub her feet or clean her windows.  The not knowing what she’ll have you doing is a big part of the thrill. 

If you’re really daring, you can give her the option of telling you where and when to get naked.  Be careful though - although female public nudity is usually tolerated, male public nudity may not be.  You don’t want to wind up getting arrested and convicted as a sex offender.

 If you enjoy CFNM or are really uninhibited, a group encounter can be a lot of fun - especially if you’re the only man in the group!  Being stark naked in front of a group of appreciative women can be an enormous turn-on.  You could offer to do a naked waiter routine for your sex buddy and her friends - even if you work for free, the “tips” will make it all worthwhile. 

Ultimately, the CFNM situation usually develops into the NFNM situation because all involved wind up getting too turned on to keep things under control.  It’s all good though!

Adult dating websites can be a lot of fun and they can provide excellent opportunities for enhancing your sex life, but you do need to use a little caution when meeting people on these sites. There are several pitfalls you need to think about and take the appropriate steps to avoid.

While meeting women on any kind of dating site is basically a numbers game, this is especially true with adult dating sites.  Actually it’s more than one numbers game.  The first numbers game is simply that the more women you contact, the greater your chance of actually meeting someone to hook up with.  Of course, the better you are at writing your profile ad, your message headlines, and your messages, the better you’ll be at that first numbers game.  The second numbers game is the more times you contact a given prospect, the more likely you’ll be able to hook up with her. 

Let’s talk about that second numbers game.  Remember, on the legitimate adult dating sites (let’s not even think about the scam sites), some women are receiving hundreds of messages per week.  Even if you are a master of writing attention-getting message subject lines  and response-generating messages, there’s still a good chance that your message will get lost in the huge volume of messages a given woman is receiving.  So if she’s someone you’re interested in, don’t be afraid to contact her on a regular basis to try to get noticed.

Now, what would be considered contacting someone on a regular basis?  Contacting someone on a daily basis, while it meets the definition of “regular”, would probably be considered stalking, which will not only not tend to generate a favorable response, but will probably wind up getting your messages blocked.  I recommend a frequency of about once every 2 to 4 weeks. 

But what if she looks really hot and you’re really anxious to meet her?  That would be your first mistake.  You really need to develop the attitude that there are plenty of good looking women to hook up with and no matter how good she may look, she’s NOT the perfect woman.  The best thing you can do to give yourself an active sex life is to NOT be too anxious to meet ANY woman.  Be a bit stand-offish.  Make contact, but don’t drool all over your keyboard as you type your message. 

You want to be persistent and continue to express interest as long as she still has a profile up and is active on the site.  Now, what do I mean by “active”?  Most sex dating sites will give you an indicator as to when the last time someone logged on to her account was.  If she hasn’t been there in over a month, definitely don’t waste your time sending her a message.  You are far better off spending your time messaging active members rather than hoping one particular woman will happen to log in again after being away for a month and happen to see your message and answer it.  If she’s hot and she does come back after being gone for a month, she’ll probably have several hundred messages in her mailbox, and most likely she’ll just delete them all and start over.  Even after just a couple of weeks, the huge volume of accumulated messages that a particularly good looking woman will undoubtedly have is more likely to be totally deleted than read, so I recommend sticking to sending messages to women who are checking in at least every week or so.  Remember, you aren’t sending these prospects messages every week - you follow-up every 2 to 4 weeks.  By sending messages every 2 to 4 weeks, you’ll be seen as someone who is interested, but not an obsessed stalker. 

You may be wondering what to send as a follow-up message.  You could simply send the same (or nearly the same) thing you did on the first contact.  There’s a good chance she didn’t get to read it the first time around.  You may want to change it up somewhat.  The main thing is to try to come up with an interesting subject line and a brief, but interesting message.  Besides that, don’t sweat it.  If you’re contacting multiple women multiple times and you don’t come across as a stalker or some clingy wussy-boy, you will meet women and you will get laid - it’s simply a matter of time.

While I recognize that the reason most people sign up on an adult dating website is to meet people for “no-strings” casual sex, sooner or later you’ll probably get hungry and you and your partner will want something to eat.  Of course, you can just go out and grab something or order food delivered, but if you want to impress a date without a whole lot of effort and without spending near as much money as going out or getting delivery, it’s good to have some basic cooking skills.

 Don’t worry, there’s some really easy things you can cook that will really impress the women you date.  For example, one of the things I cook that never fails to get great reviews is my quesadillas (which as near as I can tell is Spanish for “grilled cheese sandwich”).   All you do is take a pre-made burrito-sized tortilla, cover half of it with shredded cheese (cheddar, colby, monterrey jack, or whatever you like), then put a layer of canned chicken or imitation crab meat on top of the cheese, add a little salsa on top of that for spice, and then finish with another layer of cheese.  Fold the other half of the tortilla over the top and carefully pick it up and place it in a 10 inch or larger frying pan with a thin layer of cooking oil in the bottom of it on medium heat.  When the bottom side is browned, use two spatulas to flip it over and brown the other side.  When brown on both sides, put it on a plate to cool for a couple of minutes then cut it into three triangular pieces and serve.  These go great with a cold beer or soda. 

Another easy thing to make is homemade pizza.  Just get a pre-made crust like Boboli, cover it with a layer of your favorite spaghetti sauce, a layer of shredded cheese, and either sliced veggies (tomato, onion, mushrooms, peppers, etc.) and/or meats (pepperoni, sausage, ham, etc.) put in an oven on a baking sheet or a piece of foil at about 350 degrees and check it periodically until the cheese is melted and slightly browned.  You’re now a pizza chef! 

If things have run into the morning hours and you’re looking for a breakfast idea, I suggest the Tex-Mex classic, migas.  Migas are basically scrambled eggs with pieces of tortilla or tortilla chips mixed in with them, usuall also with salsa and cheese.  If you can make scrambled eggs, you can make migas.  Put some butter or oil in a frying pan and put in as much or as little cut-up tortilla or broken tortilla chips as you like and toast them lightly over medium heat. When lightly toasted, add your scrambled eggs, and cook as you usually would.  As the eggs get close to fully cooked, add some salsa (a little or a lot, depending on how spicy you want it), and a handful or so of shredded cheese.  Mix everything in and when the eggs are done and the cheese is melted, it’s ready to eat.  You can serve migas with toast, bacon, sausage, or any other breakfast side dish. 

Enjoy the food and enjoy how impressed your date is that you can cook!  You’ll definitely be a stand-out among the men she dates.  She’ll be back to see you even if you were lame in bed!